


Two Breaths

by hopipp (fancy2na)



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Childhood Friends, Confessions, Drowning, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Graduation, Humour, M/M, Underage Drinking, makoharu friendship, sourin friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-09
Updated: 2014-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-12 10:15:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2105928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fancy2na/pseuds/hopipp
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After saving Haruka from nearly drowning in Samezuka's pool, Rin realizes that his feelings for his friend run deeper than he thought.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Distraction

Since it was January and still too cold to use their own pool, the Iwatobi swim club had been commuting to Samezuka Academy and their luxurious indoor facilities for joint practice more often than in the warmer months.

Haruka Nanase remained quiet, as per usual, as the train rolled smoothly on the tracks. His friends were chatting loudly about something (well, Nagisa was) but Haruka's mind was too preoccupied to pay them any attention. Instead, he gazed at the passing scenery through the train window; he could't get his conversation with Amakata-sensei earlier that week out of his head.

_"Nanase-kun, it's already January and you haven't applied to any universities or colleges," she said after sitting him down at her desk after class, much to his dismay. "I'm really worried about you, don't you have any plans for after you graduate?"_

In the beginning, Haruka got irritated whenever someone pestered him about the subject. Everyone was stressing over university applications, and planning out their futures. He had written 'free' on his career-choice paper. All he knew that he wanted in life was to be one with the water. What more explanation did he need to give for people to just understand?

_"Free." he had replied, which was expected, but Amakata had just sighed and shaken her head like usual._

_"Nanase-kun, that's not an acceptable answer."_

_"I just want to swim free..."_

_"Okay... swimming!" Amakata quipped excitedly "That's a start right? Why don't you apply to a school with a swim team? Didn't a few scouters call you? You can study and swim at the same time, you know. I heard Tokyo has one of the best swim teams in Japan."_

_"....."_

_Tokyo... I think Rin mentioned something about Tokyo._ Haruka thought to himself. _I wonder if he's going to swim there..._

Suddenly, the train stopped and snapped Haruka out of his reverie. He blinked a few times and realized that they had arrived at their destination.

"We're hereeee!!!" Nagisa exclaimed, grabbing Rei's wrist and pulling him out of the train roughly "Let's go, Rei-chan!"

"Agh- Nagisa-kun, stop yanking me-"

"Hey, Haru."

Haruka felt a light tap on his shoulder. He turned to find Makoto watching him with a concerned expression.

"Is everything alright? You've been more quiet than usual lately."

Haruka gathered his few belongings off of the seat beside him. He knew Makoto had good intentions and only wanted what was best for him, but he didn't particularly have anything to tell Makoto about the subject of his future, since he was still unsure about the topic himself.

"It's nothing, Makoto." he replied honestly.

"... If you say so." Makoto shrugged and didn't pester the other any further. The two then followed their friends in the direction of Samezuka Academy.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Rin Matsuoka didn't exactly know why, but his spirit was higher and his stroke was quicker whenever he swam with one Haruka Nanase. It had always been that way, right from when the two met as children (even though Rin vehemently denied it at first). Nobody inspired him quite like Haruka did, and Rin had come to accept that fact ever since their reconciliation before the relay at regionals. Since then, Rin found himself increasingly drawn to him; the connection so powerful that he could feel the other's presence as soon as he entered the room.

"Oi, Haru!!" he called, waving excitedly at the other from across the natatorium. "Race me!"

"Blunt, aren't you?" Sousuke muttered, shaking his head.

Rin ignored him as he approached the newcomers.

"I hope you're ready, Haru~" he drawled, grinning wildly at the dark haired boy.

"Nice to see you too, Rin-chan." Nagisa pouted dejectedly. 

"Ah, sorry Nagisa!" Rin laughed, genuinely delighted to see his other friends as well. "Hey guys!"

"How's it going, Rin?"

"Good afternoon, Rin-sempai!"

Rin exchanged greetings with the others, and couldn't help but notice that Haruka was a little spaced out. He hadn't said a word since he had arrived. Rin threw an arm around his shoulder, which seemed to snap him out of it.

"You feelin' okay, Haru? You look a little pale." he commented worriedly.

"I'm fine." the other replied, shrugging out of his grasp to walk over to the pool.

Rin was a little hurt by his coldness, and Haruka must have noticed, so he gave Rin a slight smirk.

"You coming? We're going to race, right?"

"Y-Yes!" Rin replied, feeling lucky that he got to witness one of Haruka's super rare smiles. "Of course we are!"

Against all laws of physics, Haruka had somehow removed all of his clothing in one fluid motion. It was tossed carelessly to the floor as he approached the pool's edge.

Though Haruka seemed more enthusiastic than usual about racing, Rin had a feeling that something was off about him that day. He wondered if Haruka was troubled over something, or maybe he didn't get enough sleep.

He ultimately decided to drop it, since Haru never expressed himself much anyways. 

"Hey Ai, Momo, can you guys time us?" the redhead asked his juniors.

Nitori was nearby consoling Momotarou, who was visibly upset that Gou didn't come along with the others. 

"Of course, Rin-sempai!" Nitori replied excitedly, going to retrieve a stopwatch from the storage bins. 

"Hey Nitori-sempai, five bucks on Nanase." Momo whispered into his ear, instantly forgetting about Gou. 

"How could you not bet on our own captain? What's wrong with you?" 

Meanwhile, Haruka and Rin began climbing up to their starting blocks. 

"Ready, Haru?" Rin asked giddily, that familiar exhilaration he always felt while swimming with the other running through his veins like burning electricity. Everything felt as extraordinary as usual, so there was no way that anything could be wrong. 

"Yeah..." Haruka replied, staring emptily at the expanse of crystalline water before him.

"Starting in.. 3!" Nitori yelled. 

 _He said he's fine._ Rin reminded himself.

"2!"

_There's no need to be paranoid._

"1!"

_I'm not holding back._

"GO!" Momo screeched, and Rin shot into the pool like a dart through the air.

Right away, he was in the lead. It was encouraging at first, because he rarely ever surpassed Haru in the first lap since his turns were his strong point, but after a few seconds, the other's presence was still suspiciously lacking in the lane beside him.

_Something is definitely wrong..._

Haruka wasn't even close to his usual speed. Rin stole a glance behind him and Haruka was nowhere to be found.

"Nanase-san?" he heard Nitori call out worriedly.

"I take back my bet!" Momo announced without shame. 

Rin, however, had begun to panic. _Where the hell did Haru go?!?_

 _"_ Haru?" he called, searching the pool for his friend.

He hadn't seen so much as a glimpse of the other, so Rin ducked underwater. He immediately spotted pale skin and ebony hair, hanging limp near the floor of the pool like driftwood in the ocean.

"HARU!!!" Rin yelled frantically from beneath the water, causing bubbles to surround him and block out his vision.

 _This can't be happening!_ Rin swam as fast as he could, panic rising steadily with each stroke. He took Haruka's slender body into his arms, and lifted him to the surface.

 _Please be alright Haru, oh my god, please,_ Rin begged as he towed Haruka to the edge of the pool. _You can't do this to me, you just can't, you don't understand-_

"Help him up!" Nitori and Momo both took one of Haruka's limp arms and pulled him out of the water, placing him gently on the tile floor. Rin clambered out of the pool himself, sobs already threatening to wrack through his body.

Makoto was also there in an instant, and he looked just as pale as Haruka did. Nagisa was clutching Rei tightly, screaming for someone to call for help.

Clearly nobody from Iwatobi was mentally sound enough for CPR, so Rin forcibly calmed himself down and crawled his way over to Haruka's still form, disregarding everyone's panicking.

_Calm down, Rin, you can do this. You have to. You're responsible for everyone who swims in this pool._

He lowered his face in front of Haruka's, checking to see if he could feel his breathing. But there was nothing.

_Don't freak out, don't freak out, you're the captain of this team.._

Haruka's lips were slowly turning blue...

_Remember what they taught you in first aid! You can save his life!_

Without a second thought, Rin bridged the gap between them and sealed Haruka's ice cold lips with his own.  _Two breaths,_ he told himself, administering them with hot tears rolling down his face. He always was a crybaby.

_Okay, 15 chest compressions._

He placed his trembling hands over Haruka's unmoving chest, and pumped down with all of the strength he had.

_Haru, stay with me-!_

Rin breathed into Haruka's mouth once more, praying to a god that he wasn't even sure existed to save his friend's life.

_I can't lose you, I'm not done swimming with you yet!_

More chest compressions.

_I need you..._

And with a final breath, Rin felt Haruka convulsing beneath him, choking up an ocean of water.

_Haru._

Rin slumped back, breathing heavily as Haruka coughed up all of the water that had filled his lungs. 

_Thank god..._

Relief fueled Rin's tears, and he hoped that his team would think they were just water droplets from the pool. Rin was so relieved that he felt as if he too, was given back his life.

After coughing up as much liquid as he could, Haruka tried to sit up, but his hand slipped on the wet floor and he nearly hit his chin against the hard surface.

"Careful," Rin grinned, reaching out to grip his shoulders and steady him.

Haruka looked up into the redhead's watery crimson eyes in a bit of a daze.

"I was really worried about you, you idiot!" Rin's heart thumped more violently in his chest than he had ever felt in any race, or ever in his life.

_He could have actually died._

He pulled Haruka into a close, wet hug, and everything was right once again.

"Rin..." Haruka mumbled, returning the gesture without question. 

Rin was too immersed in the feeling of Haruka in his arms to notice that his teammates had started cheering. He savored the feeling of Haruka's beating heart, which he could feel against his own broad chest.

Haruka was alive, nothing else mattered.

They separated when the others began to ambush Haruka; asking him questions and exclaiming their relief.

Rin stared at him as he calmly told everyone that he was alright, and that Rin had saved him. _  
_

_Oh._

And then, everything went blurry around him, and Rin felt an impact similar to being hit in the head with a pile of bricks.

Fleetingly, Rin realized something important. Something he should have realized a long time ago.

_...._

_I nearly just lost_  

_the love of my life._


	2. Kimchi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (IGNORE MY SHITTY CHAPTER TITLES AHAH )

Haruka and the others had returned to the train station after the incident at Samezuka. The ambulance had shown up a few minutes after Haruka regained consciousness, rendering their services useless. 

Haruka sat miserably on the train, annoyed by everyone's incessant fretting over him.

"Haru-chan!! I was soooo worried about you!" Nagisa sniffled loudly into his shoulder. "Don't ever do that again!"

"Indeed, we really are glad you're alright, Haruka-sempai." Rei agreed, noting his friend's irritated expression and pulling Nagisa off of his (now tearstained) shoulder.

"The water wouldn't hurt me." Haruka protested quietly. "It was my fault... I was distracted."

Makoto was also little frazzled from the event. His brain had completely shut down when he saw the others hoist his best friend's body from over the pool's edge. Makoto had first hand experience with drowning, so he was surprised with how nonchalant Haruka was being about the whole ordeal. He didn't think the other realized how deadly the water could be, even if it was just a pool and not the ocean.

"I was really worried about you." Makoto admitted with a shaky voice. He was a little disappointed in himself for not being of any help to the situation. "I completely froze when I saw you.. I was so scared I couldn't even move. I'm sorry."

Haruka's lips formed a slight frown. "Don't apologize, Makoto. It's not your fault. Rin helped me, and I'm fine now."

Makoto sighed, deciding to just be grateful that Rin acted so fast.  

"Alright... just, please be careful next time. Don't underestimate the water."

Haruka nodded in agreement. 

"I will, I promise."

 

* * *

 

A few hours later, Haruka couldn't help but run the water for a warm bath in his tub at home. Any other person would certainly wait a while or hesitate after such an incident, however Haruka had always felt that being submerged calmed him. He still trusted the water completely.

As he soaked, he found himself replaying a scene from that day over and over in his head.

His memory was a little fuzzy, but when he first regained consciousness, he smelled nothing but chlorine and sweat. He distinctly recalled the sensation of a warm, wet mouth pressed against his own, forcing bursts of air into him. There were frantic yells coming from all around, and when he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Rin, dripping wet and smiling impossibly wide.

Rin seemed to shine in that moment...

And then, Haruka recalled the brutal coughing and aching chest. He thought he was going to have dark bruises where Rin pounded into it so mercilessly with his fists.

 _This all happened just because I was a little bit distracted_. Haruka thought idly.  _I need to pay more attention.. I cant have all of these people worrying about me_. 

He tapped the little dolphin that floated with him in his bathtub lightly with his finger. It bobbed up and down in the water, as if it were nodding in agreement.

_Rin had this same dolphin when we were kids._

_Rin..._

And yet again Haruka found himself thinking of the fiery redhead.

 _I should really thank him for all that he did for me today._  Haruka thought. _He saved my life.. maybe I can treat him to some food and thank him. Its the least I can do._

After a while, the bathwater grew cooler and Haruka dried himself off. He spent the next few hours searching the internet for an affordable restaurant nearby that served both meat and fish. And maybe even kimchi.

 

* * *

 

Rin sprawled out on his bed in the Samezuka dorms, staring at Sousuke's bunk above him as he reflected upon the events that had occurred that day.

 _Have I been in love with Haru the entire time?_ he pondered. _God, I think I have. I quite literally transferred schools just to meet him. And I thought about him every day as I trained in Australia, learning and pushing myself so that I could swim beside him. Even back then, I was completely taken with Haru. Sousuke noticed it too..._

Sousuke let out a little snore from the bed above. It was 2:47 am, and Rin was so lost in his cloud of thoughts that he couldn't fall asleep.

_Haru was always the source of my passion.. he still is. I guess I just never realized what my feelings for him really were, even though I've always had them._

At that moment Rin's elementary school graduation essay came to his mind.

_My shining.._

Even his ignorant younger self knew it!

 _I guess it took almost losing him, for real this time, to realize how much he really means to me_.

Rin tentatively brought his hand up to touch his dry lips.

 _Today.. that was almost like a kiss, wasn't it? I pressed my lips against his; I poured my breath into him..._  

Rin wished he could kiss Haruka for real, when he was actually conscious. He couldn't even deny it anymore, the thought of kissing Haruka sent small shudders spiraling throughout his body. Not that Rin had ever kissed anyone before, but how hard could it possibly be? People who didn't even know CPR did it all the time. It's just lips pressed to lips, right? Two people sharing their breath, their essence...

Rin imagined taking Haruka's face in his own two hands, savouring the feel of the other's supple skin,and pushing his ebony hair out of his eyes. Haruka would wrap his arms around Rin's waist, leaning in closer... and Rin would lean in closer too, until inevitably, the distance disappeared and their lips would collide..

 _Haru shouldn't know about this. God what if he's... homophobic? He would be so grossed out.. oh god. Would he top talking to me?_ Rin was filled with dread once again. _I can't let that happen! I won't risk our friendship over my own stupid desires. I've caused enough problems between us already, and things are finally going well now! I need to stop being so goddamn selfish all the time._

He suddenly heard his cell phone vibrate from on his desk, and he fell off the bed in shock (lucky thing he wasn't top bunk.) Who was crazy enough to text him at this ungodly time of night? Momotarou? (that kid was crazy enough to do anything without logic.)

He picked up his phone, expecting silly photos of Pyunsuke, but the sender was instead someone who shocked him. 

_Haru?! I was literally just thinking about him!_

_... though I guess that's not so unusual at this point._

 

**From: Haruka Nanase (2:52 am.)**

**\- Are you free on Sunday?**

 

Rin couldn't believe Haru was texting him. The apocalypse was surely approaching. Haru _knew_ how to actually use his cell phone? Rin thought he just kept it because Makoto forced him to. For emergencies or something.

Regardless, Haru texted him! This was something new! Rin replied eagerly, typing away from the edge of his bed.

 

**From: Rin Matsuoka (2:54 am.)**

**\- yeah im free, whats up?**

 

**From: Haruka Nanase (2:56 am.)**

**\- Meet me at the station at 6. Don't eat anything.**

 

Don't eat anything? Did Haruka just ask him out to dinner? Woah, this was escalating quickly. _~~It's NOT a date Rin don't even think about it~~_.  

Platonically or romantically, Rin was always eager to hang out with Haruka. Anything Haruka could give him, Rin would take with a huge smile. It was enough.

 

**From: Rin Matsuoka (2:58 am.)**

**\- as long as i dont have to eat mackerel i'll be there. see ya sunday!**

 

"Ugh, shut off the light, Rin." Sousuke mumbled from the top bunk "Your phone is too bright. Go to sleep."

"Ah, sorry.." he replied, setting his phone down on the wooden desk once again.

He forgot Sousuke was a light sleeper. He was fairly used to it because he travelled so much, but sometimes he really did hate sharing a room.

He climbed back onto his own bed and let out a contented sigh.

 _Five more days._. he couldn't wait for Sunday to come.

Rin Matsuoka fell asleep quickly after that, and he dreamt of pristine pools filled with shining sakura petals.

 

* * *

 

Rin was already waiting at the station when Haruka had arrived. Haru spotted him right away; he was leaning against a pillar, and wearing a maroon scarf and brown winter coat. His hair was tied back in his signature little ponytail.

"Hey, Haru!"

Rin was always delighted to see him, even if it wasn't at a pool. Haruka was glad that he thought of this idea, mainly because he never got to spend time with Rin much anymore. It was true that he saw him weekly at joint practice, but they never had time to themselves. He hadn't seen Rin in anything other than a swimsuit for months.

"Rin." He said as he approached his childhood friend "Thanks for coming."

"You never ask me to hang out, of course I couldn't say no." Rin teased, lightly slapping him on the back. "So, where are we going?"

"There's a family restaurant nearby that serves meat and seafood." Haruka said evenly "You can also get kimchi if you want."

"Ahhh, you remembered my favourite food! I'm so flattered!" Rin grinned as Haruka lead the way. "I'll definitely get some."

 

* * *

 

The restaurant wasn't busy, and it had a very casual atmosphere. Haruka couldn't afford anything too fancy, since he didn't have a job. The monthly allowance he received from his parents was a little over enough to live by, and he wasn't exactly high maintenance either.

"Hey, Rin." Haruka said awkwardly as he lifted his eyes up from his plate of mackerel-miso. "I just wanted to say thank you for saving me. I'm glad it was you.. and not some random lifeguard."

"Ah, don't mention it!" Rin said between mouthfuls of his beloved kimchi. Haruka was glad that he could find an affordable place with both of their favourites "Just be careful next time. You may be a fantastic swimmer, but anyone can drown if they underestimate the water, even professionals."

Haruka watched Rin swallow a mouthful of the spicy dish, licking some sauce of off his lips.

_He saved me with those lips..._

"Do I have sauce on my face?" Rin asked lightly, noticing Haruka's lingering gaze.

"No." Haruka replied, looking away from his friends' mouth. 

_Why was I looking there..?_

"Oh, hey, guess what?" Rin said, changing the subject "I don't think I told you yet, but I got scouted for the team at a university in Tokyo."

_Ah, so he is going to Tokyo._

"Apparently the school has supplied more athletes to Japan's Olympic swim team than any other school!" Rin added excitedly "Can you believe it?"

"That's really great, congratulations." Haruka was genuinely happy for his friend. He always admired Rin's determination to achieve his goals.

"Thanks, Haru. I think I'm finally going places." Rin said, smiling pleasantly. "I'll miss everyone, though. Especially now since we all started hanging out again."

Since the incident at the relay, and their reconciliation under the cherry blossom tree, Haruka noticed that Rin smiled significantly more often than he did before. He felt pleased that he had something to do with the return of his friend's wide, sharp-toothed smile. 

_Rin should always be smiling._

"What are _your_ plans?" the redhead asked him curiously.

The dreaded question yet again. It was all that people were interested in lately.

"I don't have any." Haruka mumbled, picking nimbly at his mackerel with his chopsticks.

"Oh... didn't you get any calls from scouters?"

Haruka had actually gotten quite a lot of calls. He wondered if any were from the same people that called Rin.

"Yeah, but I haven't accepted any." Haruka told the other.

"Haru! What are you waiting for? You should decide on somewhere!" Rin told him excitedly "You could even come to Tokyo with me!" 

"I dont know what I want to do yet..." Haruka mumbled "I may just stay here. I'm not sure."

"You can't stay here! Don't you want to do something besides just float around by yourself all day?"

_Won't you be lonely?_

"....."

Haruka just stared down at his half-eaten mackerel as if it were the most interesting thing he'd ever seen. Makoto decided to go to school in America, so he would only get to see him on the occasional visit to his family. Nagisa and Rei would still be around for another year, but lately Haruka felt as if those two were in a world of their own. He also wouldn't be able to swim with them that often, considering he would have already graduated (Iwatobi high school wouldn't want a freeloader hanging around their pool every day)

And now, Rin would be in Tokyo. The one friend he wished would stay the most, because they didn't get to swim together as often as he desired.

_Though I suppose it's selfish of me to want him to stay._

"Hey, stop admiring the dead fish on your plate and consider this-" Rin said, lifting Haruka's head up with a finger under his chin "You can go to school and swim at the same time you know? Besides, won't you miss swimming in competitions and relays?"

"Yeah..."

Haruka loved the teamwork that went into relays. He would definitely miss them. It really wasn't just about swimming, Haruka realized. He enjoyed being in the water with his friends more than anything. It wasn't quite the same soaking in his bathtub alone. 

"You should consider looking at a few schools, and maybe talk to a few of those scouters." Rin suggested "Just because deadlines for applications are coming up, you know?" 

"Ah... alright."

Rin smiled pleasantly, getting back to his dinner.

Haruka decided that he would take Rin's advice when he got home, and maybe ask Amakata-sensei about it too.

 

* * *

 

 "You look happy, where were you tonight?" Sousuke had asked Rin when he returned to his dorm afterwards.

He and Haruka had parted ways at the train station. Since there was school the next day, neither of them wanted to stay out too late. Rin was more than content with that, though, because he really enjoyed having dinner with Haruka on it's own. Whenever he saw Haruka these days, they never had time to be alone together. Someone was always there with them, whether it be Makoto or Sousuke, or any of their other respective friends.

"Haru bought me dinner, as thanks for what happened on Tuesday." he told Sousuke nonchalantly.

_Though I suppose he didn't even need to thank me. The event evened us out.. I saved him, and he saved me. Though it was from myself, and not from drowning._

"Oh, Haru." Sousuke said "You guys have been pretty close lately, huh?"

"Uh, I guess so."

"Is he gonna keep swimming too? Does he want to go pro?"

Rin figured that Sousuke was trying to scope out the competition. Sousuke was scouted by a school in Osaka, and they offered him a scholarship that he just couldn't refuse. He would also be leaving, come spring.

"He still doesn't have any idea what he wants to do. I really hope he does go pro though, because he's an amazing swimmer."

"He'd be tough competition too." Sousuke added, as he climbed up to his bunk.

Rin had long stopped thinking of Haruka as his competition.

"True, but he'd also be a powerhouse for Japan if he were to go Olympic." Rin added, feeling defensive about his other friend. "I don't think he should quit, his talent should be recognized."

"I guess so." Sousuke said, not pushing the subject any further. He let out a deep yawn. "Well, I'm tired. Night, Rin."

Rin climbed into his own waiting bed.

"G'night, Sousuke."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to mention that as I wrote this, S2 was still being aired, therefore, it obviously will not be parallel to the canon. For the sake of this story, Makoto is going to America and Sousuke's shoulder is completely fine hahaha -3-


	3. Shark-jitsu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which our boys celebrate Rinrin's 18th birthday

The boys sat with their lunches in the clubroom two weeks after the incident at Samezuka's pool, since it was still a bit too cold to eat outside on the roof. Haruka was looking down at his mackerel-bento lunch and once again not paying attention to the others' chatter. 

He hadn't spoken a lot that day, or at all lately for that matter. His mind was elsewhere, sometimes thinking about his future, and sometimes deliberately _not_ thinking about it.

"mphey guysmph-" Nagisa's speech was muffled by his mouthful of custard buns, so Rei interrupted him with a palm placed over his mouth. 

"Swallow before you speak, Nagisa-kun. Your chewing is unsightly." he sighed.

A devious glint appeared in Nagisa's eyes, and next thing Haruka knew Rei was yelping and yanking his hand away. A rosy blush stained Rei's cheeks.

"D-Don't _lick_ me! Are you insane?!" he sputtered.

Nagisa smiled mischievously, and nudged him with his elbow."Sorry Rei-chan, I saw the opportunity and I took it. You're so cute when you blush."

Rei made a gagging noise, and Nagisa giggled at his embarrassment.

"What were you saying before, Nagisa?" Makoto asked curiously.

"Uhhhh.." Nagisa scratched his head, trying to remember "Oh yeah, isn't Rin-chan's birthday coming up soon?"

"I think so, but I'm not sure what day it is." Makoto replied "Maybe we should ask Gou?"

"It's February second." Haruka stated, and everyone turned to look at him as if they were surprised that he joined the conversation.

"I remember that he would usually come visit his parents around this time while he was in Australia." Haruka added. 

He recalled Rin's first visit home from Australia. It was during that visit that he challenged Haruka to the race that ended with Rin's tearful loss. It was what made Haruka stop competitive swimming, until last year. Needless to say, it wasn't one of his best memories.

"Does Rin-chan usually come to Iwatobi on his birthday?" Nagisa asked, swallowing his food before speaking this time "I was thinking we should all hang out, since we reconciled and everything! What do you guys think?" 

"That's a good idea! It would be nice to spend more time with everyone, especially since we'll be separating when the new term starts." Makoto added.

"Where should we host this... get-together?" Rei asked.

"Uhhh, my house is no good. My sisters always have their friends over." Nagisa shook his head.

"I don't think mine is a good idea either, since I have the twins gallivanting everywhere" Makoto shrugged. 

Rei crossed his arms "I would suggest mine but I don't think Rin-san would be too comfortable there, since he still doesn't know me as well as you all."

They all looked at Haruka expectantly.

"My house is fine." He deadpanned. 

His house was sort of the hang out spot anyways, since he lived alone. He had a hunch that they would want to have it there since Nagisa brought the idea up. He didn't particularly mind either, he hadn't had Rin visit his house since elementary school.

"Thanks Haru-chan! It'll be great! We can play games and eat tonnes of cake!" Nagisa bounced excitedly.

"Should we invite the rest of his team? Or how about Gou?" Makoto questioned. 

 _I'd rather not have them in my house_. Haruka thought _Especially after what happened between me and Yamazaki-san._

"Nah, let's make it just us, like the good old days!" Nagisa quipped.

"What about me?" Rei asked, looking a little dejected. 

"And you too, of course, Rei-chan. You were practically there." 

"So it's official then?" Makoto asked, checking each of his friends' for confirmation. "Who's gonna text him?"

"Haru, it's your house." 

"I also think Haruka-sempai should do it." 

Once again, everyone was looking at Haruka. Their expectant stares made him a bit uncomfortable, but he was completely fine with texting Rin.

"Alright." He mumbled, pulling out his hardly-used cell phone. "What do I say?" 

"Hmm, just say 'Rin-chan, your awesome Iwatobi friends want to celebrate your birthday with you! Drop by my crib at 6 for one hell of a party!' Something like that~" 

Haruka quietly typed the invitation to Rin, rephrasing it to something much less extravagant. He felt a weird anticipation when he sent it, almost as if he was eager to receive Rin's reply.

"Done." He announced flatly when he was finished.

Surprisingly, Rin answered almost right away.

 

 

**From: Rin Matsuoka (1:36 pm.)**

**\- i was planning on heading there to see gou and my mother anyways, so i'll come by when im done >:)**

 

 

He was clearly all for the idea, judging by the smiley face at the end of his message. Haruka felt a little excited, he hadn't seen Rin since the dinner two weeks ago. He also hadn't celebrated his friend's birthday with him since they were children 

"What kind of gift should we get him?" Makoto asked, always the thoughtful one. 

"Maybe something for his dorm?" Rei suggested. 

"Oh, how about a picture frame?" Nagisa chirped "That way he can put it up, and be reminded of us every day!" 

"We can put that photo of all of us after the relay in it, because Rei is there too." 

"Yeah that sounds acceptable."

"Alright, it's decided!" 

In the end, everyone was given a different task. Haruka's job was to go out and pick a frame and card, Makoto was in charge of house decorations and printing the photo, Rei was responsible for wrapping everything, and Nagisa would supply the food and drinks. They divided all of the costs and pitched in their debts, planning to meet at Haruka's house for 6pm on the evening of Rin's birthday. 

Haruka knew that he was responsible for choosing a nice frame and card, so he made it his mission to find those which Rin would like best. After all, he missed several of Rin's past birthdays, so he thought this time he should make it special.

 

* * *

 

A few days later, when Haruka finally got around to visiting the store, he spent over twenty minutes deciding between a frame with colourful seashells embedded into it and a frame shaped like a shark. He ended up choosing the seashell frame, and got Rin a card with a shark wearing sunglasses on it because he thought there should be a shark _somewhere._ Rin loved sharks.

As Haruka began his walk home, he saw some interesting looking bracelets in a window display in a jewellery store. A bracelet made of a braided leather cord caught his eye. It had a few blue beads strung through it, and it closed with a loop and blue button. 

 _I can see Rin wearing that.._ he thought to himself. _He likes to wear jewelry._

As he examined the bracelet, he came to like it more and more. The blue beads were so pretty.. they reminded him of the ocean. _I should really wear more_ _jewelry_. Haru thought to himself. _Maybe I can get one too, and then Rin and I can match._

He ended up buying two, and decided on giving the extra gift to Rin privately, just because he felt like it.

 _I_ _f he doesn't like it, he can return it._ Haruka thought to himself as he walked home with one frame, one card, and two bracelets.

 

* * *

 

On the day of Rin's birthday, everyone met at Haruka's house to get ready before Rin actually got there.

Nagisa arrived first, towing a bag stuffed with snacks and drinks (thankfully, they were not _all_ strawberry flavoured). They called over Makoto, who arrived right away and helped them decorate the house and put the snacks into bowls and plates.

"Nagisa, what _is_ that?" Makoto asked cautiously, pointing at a bottle of unknown liquid that Nagisa had placed on the counter.

"Oh, I snuck this out of my parent's sake stash!" he exclaimed excitedly "I thought it would be nice if we all had a toast later!" 

"Well, I guess a bit can't hurt..." Makoto carefully examined the glass bottle "Plus, it's a special occasion."

Haruka wordlessly dumped some barbecue chips into a bowl until the doorbell rang again. This time it was Rei, holding the expertly wrapped gift in his hands.

Haruka had given Rei the frame and card, and Makoto had given him the printed photo so that he could wrap them. Everyone seemed to like Haruka's choice in frame, but Rei hated the accompanying card very passionately. 

"But a shark wearing sunglasses isn't _beautiful_!" he whined.

"That's not true! I think it's awesome, Haru-chan. Rei-chan is just a hater." Nagisa quipped.

Rei scoffed, about to start another argument until Makoto interrupted. "Hey, we should all write in it before Rin gets here!" 

"Oh yeah, good idea."

 

* * *

 

Nostalgia hit Rin like a crashing wave when he arrived at Haruka's house. He recalled all of the time his younger self had spent here; he and Haru would play games, explore, and do whatever else it was that kids did. They would run through that very same door in front of him, laughing and screaming (well, Rin would).

Before knocking on said door, Rin had to take a few minutes to steel himself. Things were different now. Especially for him, who had all of these not-so-new feelings.

 _Keep them to yourself..._ Rin told himself sternly.

He took a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm his raging heart.

_Be cool, Rin. Have fun, it's your birthday._

He brought his fist up to the wood and knocked loudly. 

"RIN-CHAN! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Nagisa jumped him as soon as the door opened, glomping him mercilessly. Rin was pretty sure he would have suffocated if his winter coat didn't provide so much cushioning.

"Thanks, Nagisa" Rin laughed, hugging him back.

"Happy eighteenth Rin!" Makoto appeared, ushering him inside "Glad you could make it."

"Thank you Makoto!" he replied with a smile.

Rei and Haruka were sitting by the kotatsu, which held all sorts of snacks and drinks. There were even colourful streamers and balloons with the number '18' on them strewn about the room.

"Happy birthday Rin-san." Rei said when he entered, shaking his hand for the occasion.

Haruka was sitting quietly at the kotatsu, observing Rin's interactions with everyone else. He appeared to be a little at loss for what to do since Rin had arrived.

"You're quiet as usual, Haru." Rin commented lightly, taking off his jacket and hanging it on a hook. He then plopped down right beside Haruka, experiencing an interesting mix of calm and restless feelings just by being in his close proximity. 

Haruka reached under the kotatsu and pulled out a flat red box with a golden bow, holding it out before his red-haired friend. 

"Happy birthday, Rin. This is from all of us." he blushed slightly as Rin lit up and accepted the gift. 

Rin was more than delighted, they didn't have to get him anything! He really wasn't expecting this.. he hoped they didn't spend too much money on him.

The other boys sat down too, watching Rin as he examined the box curiously. 

"Just rip it open!" Nagisa complained.

"Hey! I spent quite a lot of time wrapping that." Rei said "Give Rin-san some time to appreciate my perfect folds-"

"This isn't origami, Rei-chan-"

"The wrapping is very nice, Rei." Rin interrupted Nagisa's complaint as he slipped the ribbon off.

Rin glimpsed Haruka watching him from the corner of his eye. He looked stiff with his legs crossed and arms folded.

"Hey Haru, hold this for me would you?" 

The others laughed as Rin tied the golden ribbon around Haru's forehead like a headband. Rin tied a messy knot, giggling the entire time. As he pulled his hands away, his fingers brushed through Haru's silky hair, along his smooth temples, and down his jaw. Rin's giggles stopped immediately, realizing what he had just done.

 _Shit, that was lingering._ Rin cursed himself. _Did he notice..?_

He did not. Haru was grimacing at his new headband, but he didn't take it off or complain. He didn't even notice Rin's more-sensual-than-it-should-be touch.

"Read the card now, Rin-chan!" Nagisa said excitedly.

"Haruka-sempai picked it out, in case you're wondering about the silly design. I definitely wouldn't mmpph---." Nagisa covered Rei's mouth with his palm, thoroughly shutting him up.

"I'd like any card you guys gave me," Rin said as he removed it from it's envelope, discovering the sunglasses-clad shark on the cover.   
  
"But THIS card is the definition of awesome." Rin laughed, burning the image of Haruka's embarrassed expression into his mind forever.

"The shark made me think of you." Haruka added quietly, fiddling with his new headband.

Inside the card, each of Rin's friends wrote him a short birthday message.   
  
  
  
_Happy Birthday Rin-chan!!! Try not to miss me too much in Tokyo eh? ;-)_  
  
 _love, your AWESOME friend Nagisa_  
 _*\\(≧∇≦)/ *_  
  
  
  
 _Rin-chan-san, thank you for taking the time to help me with my swimming. Happy birthday!_  
  
 _\- Ryuugazaki Rei_  
  
  
  
 _Happy birthday Rin! I'm really glad that we've become friends again! I hope you enjoy our gift._  
  
 _from, Makoto :)_  
  
  
  
 _Happy birthday, Rinrin._  
  
 _\- Haru_

  
  
Rin read that last one eagerly, he didn't really know what he expected, certainly not the use of his old pet name. He couldn't believe Haruka even remembered that embarrassing nickname.

Regardless, Rin cherished the little messages written in the card. They were written by his friends, after all.

"Thanks guys," he grinned, reaching for the red box "Should I open this now too?"

"Of course! We hope you like it" Makoto added as Rin began to unwrap the gift.

"You can put it in your room, so you never forget about us!" Nagisa chirped.

Rin's eye's stung with tears when he first saw the present. The frame itself was covered in all kinds of seashells; it looked delicate and crafty. He stood it up on the table with extreme caution, paranoid that he might drop it with his shaking hands. The picture within it, was what really made him happy. It was a group photo of all of them at the tournament, right after their relay together. He remembered posing for the photo, draping his arm over bashful Haruka like he always did. He was happy that Rei got into the picture too, because he belonged there just as much (if not more) as Rin himself did.

"Guys.. you didn't have to do this for me." Rin said, willing his voice to not crack "I'll definitely put it up. Thank you!"

Makoto gave him a clap on the back, and Nagisa cheered happily.

"It was totally my idea!!"

Rin smiled impossibly wide. He felt as if today was one of the happiest days of his life, since he came back from Australia.  
 

* * *

 

A while later, Nagisa and Haruka emerged from the kitchen carrying strawberry shortcake and the bottle of sake that Nagisa had brought.

"Everyone, we're going to have a toast!" he announced, sitting down and proceeding to unscrew the bottle.

"We can't drink that! We're underage!" Rei protested as Nagisa poured some of the clear liquid into glasses for each of them.

"Just a bit won't hurt, plus it's a special occasion." he replied as he passed them out.

Haruka stared into his glass with distaste. He had no intention of drinking his, either.  
  
"I'll drink yours if you don't like it, Haru." Rin nudged him gently.  
  
"If you want."

They all sat around the kotatsu with the glasses in their hands. Nagisa took it upon himself to make the toast, since it was his idea. He cleared his throat.

"Alright, so this toast is not just for Rin-chan's birthday, but for Makoto-chan and Haru-chan too." Nagisa said, noting the surprised expressions on the others faces "Good luck to all three of you guys in the new year. Whatever you choose to do, or wherever you go, make sure you have fun! And don't forget about Rei-chan and I! Cheers!"

"Agreed!"

The boys all clinked their glasses together. Rin and Nagisa both drank theirs in one gulp. Makoto sniffed his, hesitated, then took a sip too.

"Bleh, sake is not for me." he mumbled, putting the glass back down.

"Here, Rin." Haruka placed his sake on the table in front of the other.

"Have mine too." Makoto said as he dumped the rest of his into the same glass as Haruka's.

Rin stared at the completely full glass of alcohol, debating whether or not to drink it.

 _"_ Well, it _is_ my birthday." he concluded, picking it up and swallowing everything down with one gulp.

Haruka noticed a rosy blush creeping up on Rin's pale complexion.

"Might as well finish off Rei's too." he said, reaching across the table for it.

"Go Rin-chan!" Nagisa wooed as Rin swallowed it with another huge gulp.

"That's a bit much isn't it?" Rei whispered to Haruka.

Haruka just shrugged, and watched Rin lick his lips. Lately, he just couldn't stop staring at them..

"It's his birthday, so it's okay."

Makoto began cutting and handing out pieces of the strawberry shortcake.

"Oh, no thanks, I don't want any." Rin replied when Makoto offered him a slice. "I'll just have some more sake, I never knew this stuff was so good!" he turned expectantly to Nagisa "There's more right?"

"You got it!"

Nagisa retreated to the kitchen to grab the rest of the bottle. First he and his older friend kept refilling their cups, but eventually they got tired of it and just took turns drinking straight from the bottle, giggling maniacally the entire time.

Haruka quietly accepted a piece of cake from Makoto. He couldn't help but watch his other friends' strange behavior as he picked at it. 

Haruka had never been drunk before, but he could tell right away that Rin and Nagisa were very drunk. Especially after they finished that entire bottle of sake.  
  
"Rin-chan, I have t' ask, how come you have pointy teeth? Like, y' didn't before. Actually, maybe one or two were pointy? But definitely not all of them. Definitely not." Nagisa slurred, getting really close to Rin so he could stare at his teeth "Did'ja sell your soul t' a shark or somethin'?"

"Oh man, I don't even know. When my baby teeth fell out... Poof! Shark teeth!" Rin smiled widely, showing off his pointy incisors.

"Holy shit, maybe you're part shark!" Nagisa screamed excitedly "Can you, like, breathe underwater!?"

Rin shook his head. "No, no no. I'm like, 95% sure I can't. But m' not certain."

"We gotta test it out!" Nagisa screeched, then turned around and roughly placed his hands on a surprised Haruka's shoulders. With a straight face, he said "Haru-chan, we need t' use your bathtub."

"Down the hall to the left." Haruka replied.

"ARE YOU CRAZY?" Rei cried, blocking the hallway entrance with his long arms. "Do you want Rin-san to drown?"

"Awwww Rei-chan! You're such a party pooper."

"Hey, don't lead them on." Makoto told Haruka as Rin and Nagisa grumbled and sat back down.

"Oh, sorry."

Rin crawled beside Haruka, _right_ beside Haruka, leaving very little space between them. Haruka felt a strange tightening feeling in his stomach.

"I can't believe you're still wearing that!!" Rin giggled, poking the ribbon he had tied around Haruka's forehead before. "You look like a ninja! Haaaa-!"

"He's like a... uhh... a water ninja!" Nagisa exclaimed as Rin shakily took the ribbon off of Haruka and struggled to tie it around his own forehead. Haruka shooed his hand away and helped him tie a decent knot.

Meanwhile, Rei began freaking out about the alcohol. "How is Nagisa-kun going to get home in this state? What if his parents are home?!"

"It should be okay if you walk him," Makoto consoled him reassuringly "Plus he has older sisters, so they'll know how to help in the morning."

Rei looked a little more relieved, but he still watched Nagisa laugh drunkenly with an icy expression.

"At least he's nowhere near as drunk as Rin." Makoto supplied. "Never would have thought Rin to be such a lightweight."

Rin was making weird hand gestures and noises, which Haruka assumed were meant to be ninja-like.

"Don't kill me with your shark-jitsu, Rin-chan!" Nagisa was laughing so hard that he fell to the floor, clutching his stomach.

"Haru, you should let Rin stay here overnight." Makoto told him quietly "I don't think it's a good idea to put him on the train by himself."

"That's true," Haruka agreed "I'll go set up the futon." 

* * *

Haruka pulled the futon out of his bedroom closet, his friends' laughter from the other room still audible.

He wasn't sure why, but watching Rin and Nagisa drink and laugh together made him feel slightly unpleasant. He regretted not drinking his own sake, maybe he wouldn't feel so strange right now.

 _I'm not... jealous._ He told himself sternly, as he set up the futon beside his bed. This feeling was the similar to the feeling he felt seeing Rin with Yamazaki-san and Nitori-san. It was a sort of lonely feeling, like at any moment Rin would leave Haruka behind yet again for bigger, better things.

_Like Tokyo.._

He suddenly remembered the bracelet he had bought for the other, which was lying on his desk. He pushed his stupid thoughts to the back of his mind, and picked up the matching bracelet that he had bought for himself. He fastened it around his wrist, then headed back down the hall to rejoin the others.

He'd also have to give Rin his gift sometime later too.
    
    
        
    
        
    
    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for the record, Rin's birthday really is February 2nd! 
> 
> Also, i hope nobody seems OOC.. the party shall continue in the next chapter!
> 
> thanks for reading ;D


	4. Sake

When Haruka returned to his living room, he was immediately ambushed by his drunk friend.

"Haru! Help me!" Rin whined, squeezing his arm tightly. "That kid is tryna' kill me! He's the devil, I swear!"

Nagisa was fast approaching, a plate of his sugary pink weapon in hand. "Just ONE bite, Rin-chan! It's strawberry shortcake! How can you resist...?"

"Noooo! It HATE sweets!!"

Rin hid behind Haruka, holding him in front of his head like a shield. He pressed his face into Haruka's back, blocking his mouth from Nagisa. Haru was distracted by the feeling of Rin's skin through the thin fabric of his shirt, and it made him shiver all over. He normally hated it when people touched him so casually, but for some reason he didn't mind when Rin did it. It was sort of... pleasant. 

"But it's _strawberry_!" Nagisa huffed, then began eating the cake himself in defeat. "Fine, more for me."

Rin peeked from behind Haru, noticing Rei approach Nagisa with a disdainful expression.

"You're going to give yourself cavities.. Nagisa-kun." he grumbled, removing the paper plate from the blonde's grasp.

Nagisa grinned deviously.

"REI-CHAN YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT!" 

He pounced onto Rei, causing him to drop the cake all over the both of them. 

Rin laughed hysterically as Rei gasped, now covered in pink frosting.

"Nagisa-kun! This was a new 100% linen shirt.."

"S' your own fault, Rei-chan."

The others watched with amusement as Nagisa dipped his finger into some frosting on Rei's neck, and licked it off with a smile.

"Yummy!"

 

* * *

 

"I need to get home guys, it's past my curfew." Makoto announced a while later, reaching for his jacket.

"I think I'm going to bring Nagisa-kun home now too." Rei said, helping his drunken friend get up off the floor. "He's falling asleep..."

"Naww m'not." Nagisa gurgled, then went limp in Rei's arms.

"I'll help you carry him out." Makoto told Rei.

"Ah, thanks. Goodnight Haruka-sempai. Rin-san." Rei nodded as he and Makoto heaved Nagisa through the door.

"Awwww everyone's leaving?" Rin pouted sadly.

"Haru, give Rin some water or something, so he won't feel as sick in the morning." Makoto called out. "Bye guys!"

"Bye." Haruka replied as the door closed behind them.

"Ooouuuu it's just us now~" Rin cooed "Unless you want me to leave too?"

"No, you're sleeping here. I set up the futon."

"Yaaaay!" Rin cheered happily "S' a sleepover! Just like when we were kids!"

Rin was still quite intoxicated, and it didn't help that he hadn't eaten anything the entire night. Haruka took Makoto's advice and poured him a glass of water.

"Rin, drink this." He said as he held out the glass.

"Are you giving me more sake?" Rin asked jokingly, and Haruka almost cracked a smile.

"It's water, drink some and you won't feel so sick tomorrow."

"Aww Haru you _do_ care!" Rin smiled as he accepted the glass.

 

* * *

 

 Rin tripped or crashed into things when he tried to walk, so Haruka helped him get to his room with an arm around his broad shoulder.

"Heeeey, you smell nice." Rin commented as he sniffed Haruka's hair.

Haruka sighed and dropped him on his bed. Did all drunks say strange things, or was Rin the only one?

"Ahh this is comfy!" Rin chirped, rolling around on Haruka's mattress like a kid "'Smells like you."

Haruka supposed he didn't mind sleeping on the futon, if Rin liked the bed so much. He wasn't picky.

"I'll lend you something to sleep in, so take your clothes off."

He turned around and opened his closet to look for an old t-shirt or something that Rin could wear, since he hadn't come packed for overnight. He heard a loud gasp from behind him.

"Take my clothes off?! Is Haruka Nanase tryna' _seduce_ me?!" Rin waggled his eyebrows mischievously.

Haruka felt a blush creep up over his cheeks. He pulled a slightly too-big yellow shirt with iwatobi-chan on it out of his drawer.

"I'm not." he said as he tossed it to him "Put that on."

"You're blushing!" Rin giggled, bouncing excitedly on the bed "You're so cute, Haru!"

Haruka face became even redder at that comment, which he prayed Rin wouldn't notice. Why was Rin embarrassing him so much lately?

He glanced at his desk, and was reminded of the extra birthday gift once again. He took the bracelet off the desk, and quietly sat down beside his childhood friend. Rin was still giggling incoherently, so Haruka gently took his wrist and tied the bracelet around it. The blue beads looked lovely contrasted against Rin's pale skin.

"This for me?" Rin asked curiously, examining the new piece of jewelry.

Haruka thought the style suited him very nicely. He glanced at his own wrist, which was adorned with the same accessory.

"Happy birthday, Rin" he said with a small smile.

"D'aww Haru! I love it!" He gushed, tackling his friend down on the bed with a huge hug.

The mattress springs squeaked as they landed with a thud. Rin held the embrace for longer than necessary, pressing his chest so closely to Haruka's that Haruka could feel his rapid heartbeat. Unlike how touches from others felt, Rin's hug felt pleasant and welcome. A tingling warmth spread through his entire body, from his toes to the top of his head, and Haruka brought his arms up and around his friend to gently return the embrace. 

Rin tensed, and Haruka immediately let go.

_Does Rin not like me touching him..?_

Rin then propped himself up on his elbows, trapping Haruka beneath him in a cage of splayed limbs. Haruka watched the cheeky expression drain from his friend's face as he realized what position they were in... it was a position similar to that day under the cherry blossom tree, right before the relay.

The younger boy stared intently at him, and the warm tingling that Haruka had felt before began transforming into an intense burning that made his heart flutter and his clothes feel too tight. 

"Haruka." Rin murmured his full name.

He lowered his face closer to Haruka's, his hair dangling down and brushing against Haruka's face. His eyes were a bloody crimson, and Haruka found himself helplessly getting sucked into them, immobilized by them...

"I feel like kissing you right now." Rin told him bluntly, running the back of his hand along Haruka's jaw. "Can I kiss you?"

Haruka leaned into the touch, welcoming it. Rin's hands were soft, though they didn't look it. Haruka began parting his lips, automatically and without thought, as if his body was acting on instinct without consulting his brain first. Rin leaned closer, so close that Haruka could almost taste the sake on his breath.

_The sake._

Haruka panicked and snapped his head to the side, finally seeing the situation how it really was. 

 _Rin is intoxicated, and therefore saying and doing things that he doesn't really mean._  he told himself instantly. _What other explanation could there be for his behavior? If he were in his right mind he would never say such a thing..._

"Get off me." Haruka choked, struggling to keep his voice even.

There was a short silence, and then the tickle of Rin's hair was gone. He sighed loudly, then rolled over and released Haruka from his hold. 

 _That was.. that was close_. Haruka thought. _I almost took advantage of Rin. And for what reason? Why didn't I push him away?_

"Rin.. you're still drunk." he whispered.

The redhead stared back at him, his hair and clothing askew. 

"Maybe, but... I always feel like kissing you. Even when m' not." 

_He always feels like kissing me?_

"...."

Haru was incapable of speech, his heart was beating so frantically he thought it would come flying right out of his mouth if he opened it.

_Was that.... a confession? No, there's no way._

Rin hiccuped a few times, then began changing into the shirt that Haruka had lent him, as if nothing had even happened.

 _Why do I wish that it was?_ Haruka thought worriedly. _Why has Rin been affecting me like this?_

"M' tired, Haru. I wanna sleep...." Rin murmured, curling up on the bed.

"Go to sleep then." Haruka whispered back softly, finding his voice once more.

"'Kay..."

Haruka switched off the lights, then made his way over to the futon.

He still felt strange as he lay down, just below his friend. His body was no longer burning, but it still felt very unsettling. He was hyperaware of Rin's presence, and he kept remembering the warmth of Rin's arms, the feathery tickle of hair against his face, and of course, the smell of his tainted breath.

"G'night Haru." Rin mumbled, rolling around to face the wall.

Haruka could still see his curled up form before he closed his eyes.

"Night, Rin."

 

* * *

 

Even though Haru gave him plenty of water, Rin still felt extremely sick in the morning. The loud pounding in his head was one of the worst headaches he'd ever felt in his life. His head was spinning around and around, and the _nausea!_ He could feel the bile slowly creeping up through his throat. He supposed these symptoms were inevitable for a person who drank more than half of a bottle of sake, and not a thing to eat in one night.

When he had woken up, he sprinted to Haruka's toilet to release the few contents that were actually in his stomach. He apologized over and over to his quiet friend, who helped him hold back his long hair as he retched.

"What the fuck was I thinking.. I'm such a goddamn idiot. Stupid, stupid." he chanted as they returned to the living room. "I'm never drinking again. That was horrible. Definitely my last time."

Haruka went into the kitchen and made some barley tea for the both of them.

"Maybe this will help." He said as he handed Rin the steaming mug.

"Oh, thanks." Rin replied as they both sat down. "I really hope so."

He had a suspicion that he had said something really embarrassing to Haru last night, but he couldn't recall what. He prayed that he didn't do anything insane like dance around naked or confess his love to his raven haired friend. That would be _mortifying._

"Did you enjoy the party yesterday?" Haru asked him as they both sipped their steaming tea.

"What I remember I absolutely loved." Rin said truthfully "But... I can't really remember what I did after finishing that sake with Nagisa."

Haruka nodded quietly, and Rin felt like a total ass for getting so drunk that he couldn't remember much of the party that his friends so thoughtfully threw him.

"Hey, I'm sorry about the way I acted last night." he mumbled "I have a feeling I was really troublesome."

Haruka stared at him agape, clearly not expecting an apology.

"Even now, you're taking care of me. I appreciate it, thank you."

 _Poor Haruka shouldn't have had to put up with my drunken idiocy_. Rin thought idly. _He's too good for me._

"Apology accepted, but it was no trouble at all." Haru responded, his expression soft and thoughtful "Friends are always there for each other." Rin's gaze shifted to the floor.

 _Friends are always there for each other_...

_But soon, I won't always be there for Haru._

"I'm going to Tokyo soon." he announced suddenly, bring his eyes up to meet Haru's cool azure gaze "I want to follow my dad's dream, but I also want to stay here and be with you."

Rin went quiet, realizing the bluntness in what he had just said. "Uh, I mean, I want to swim with you." he added hesitantly.

"I want to be with you too." Haruka replied.

"I wish.." Rin mumbled "I wish you would just come with me. Then we could swim together."

_Then I'd have everything._

Haruka's mouth formed a taut line, and he cast his eyes down to the floor. Rin regretted bringing the topic up; he didn't want Haru to feel bad about anything. Rin _himself_ was the greedy one. Haru wasn't obliged to go anywhere he didn't want to on Rin's behalf.

"I've been thinking about it." Haruka admitted after a minute of silence.

 _What..?_ Rin's heart soared.

"I've been looking at the schools that are trying to scout me, including yours, but I haven't decided anything yet."

"Oh my god, Haru!" Rin nearly jumped from his seat with excitement "Come to Tokyo! You can join the team with me, and live with me, and take the same classes as me! It's perfect, and you'll even be in the same city as your parents!"

"But, what will I study there?" Haruka asked sadly "I have no idea..."

"I'm getting into kinesiology and phys ed, so that even after when I'm too old for the Olympics, I'll be able to teach sports and fitness!" Rin told him passionately "What do you like to do besides swim, Haru?"

"Uh...."

Rin impatiently waited as Haruka seriously thought for a few minutes. He knew that for Haruka, there wasn't anything as satisfying as being in the water. But there had to be something a _little_ close, right?

"Housework is okay. So are cooking and drawing." Haruka decided.

"Maybe not _housework_ , but cooking and drawing are a start! Why don't you see if they offer culinary classes, or art classes? Or you could even take the same classes as me!"

"I'll think about it." Haruka promised.

Rin was overjoyed, he definitely didn't expect Haru to consider Tokyo.

 _What a dream that would be..._  he thought to himself _Living with Haru in Tokyo. Seeing him every day. Swimming with him, even if not for an Olympic team. Just getting more time to simply_ be _with him._

Haruka picked the empty mugs off the table, and Rin followed him into the kitchen, snapping out of his reverie.

Haruka placed the mugs in the sink, and began to roll up his sleeves. Rin noticed that he was wearing a leather bracelet around his wrist.

_That's new, I never see him wearing jewelry._

"Cool bracelet." Rin commented as Haruka removed it to wash the dishes. "Is it new?"

_It's not creepy that I notice small things like that, right?_

"Thanks... yes, someone else has the same one." Haruka told him.

"Oh, who?"

_Why does he look so sad?_

"Someone important to me."

Rin decided not to push the topic further. Makoto was probably the person with the matching bracelet. He felt a little jealous, but then reminded himself that Haru was allowed to have other friends besides him. He remembered his awesome seashell frame and shark card in the living room, and his chest filled up with warmth.

With a new flicker of hope ignited in his chest, Rin left Haruka's house that morning grinning like a lovestruck idiot,

because,

thats exactly what he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *please drink responsibly kids*


	5. Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which both boys need a little push from others

Makoto Tachibana was sitting at home, silently doing his history homework, when out of nowhere he felt a light tap on his shoulder.

"Uwah!!" he cried, nearly falling off of his chair in shock.

"Makoto." a familiar voice said.

His friend Haruka was standing beside him, clearly having let himself in his house without warning.

"Haru, don't scare me like that!" Makoto sighed, putting down his pen. "What's up?"

"I need to talk to you." Haruka said with a hesitant expression "Could we go outside?"

 _This is unusual._ Makoto thought worriedly.  _Haru never requests to go outside when he asks me questions. I really hope it's nothing serious._

"Uh, sure. Let me just clean all this up."

After Makoto put his books away, he and Haruka tugged on their jackets and took a seat outside on the steps between their houses. The snow from winter had all melted, but it was still a little chilly, so their breaths escaped them in a white cloud.

"I need to ask you something." Haruka announced, keeping his eyes fixed on the bottom of the steps, where cars could be seen buzzing by.

"What is it?" Makoto replied, seriously concerned about his passive friend.

_Did something bad happen with Rin after Nagisa, Rei, and I left yesterday?_

Haru was silent for a few more minutes, but eventually he asked Makoto the question, and Makoto definitely didn't expect to hear such a question escape from _Haru's_ lips.

"Have you ever been in love?"

Haru, who was always so aloof and uninterested in anything remotely romantic, was asking Makoto about love. This was indeed very strange.

"No... I haven't." the brunette replied truthfully "Have you?"

Haru was quiet for a long period of time once again. Makoto waited patiently, he had a feeling that this was difficult for his friend to voice out loud.

"I think I might be." Haruka eventually said. "But I'm not sure."

 _Seriously?! Do I know her?!_  Makoto was tempted to ask. But, after thinking realistically about it, he had a hunch who the person Haruka might love was. In fact, he was almost certain. 

And... it definitely _wasn't_ a girl.

Since they were kids, Rin was always smitten with the raven haired boy. Even now, he didn't bother hiding his feelings. Or did Rin just not realize how painfully obvious they were? He would bring Haruka up constantly in conversation, and when their eyes met, Rin would light up like the sun. When they raced, he would  _come to life,_ swimming with a passion thatMakoto was a little bit envious of. 

 _Gosh, how has Haru not noticed?_ Makoto wondered.  _But then again, Haru never notices anything_ _._

"How does someone know if they're in love?" Haruka asked quietly, fiddling with a thread dangling off of his woolen mitten "Is there a way to be sure?"

Makoto smiled at his bashful friend, happy that he trusted him for advice on such a subject. He was a little regretful that he didn't have any advice to give from personal experience, but he's witnessed the love between his parents, and seen love portrayed on television, so he was pretty sure he knew what the sentiment consisted of. It was definitely something his two childhood friends had together. 

"Well.." Makoto replied, thinking of the best way to get Haruka to realize the obvious. Straightforwardness was always best with him. "Are you _attracted_ to this person?"

"...."

Haruka's face was completely blank, not indicating any remote understanding of the question.

"Like, do you want to hold hands with them and kiss them?" Makoto added.

"Ah, well..." Haru mumbled, recalling some sort of memory "This person tried to kiss me, and I... I wasn't grossed out."

An image of Rin roughly pushing Haru up against a wall appeared in Makoto's mind.

 _Yep, I'd rather not know the details._ he thought.

"I kind of wanted them to kiss me. I felt disappointed after when they didn't." Haruka admitted "Actually, now that I think about it, we kind of have kissed already. Just.. not really. And I wasn't conscious."

 _The CPR,_ Makoto realized.

"Do you care a lot for this person?" he asked, continuing his line of questions. Makoto already knew the answer to this one, but he hoped that making Haruka admit these things out loud would help him finally realize what they meant.

"Yes." he replied right away.

Makoto was certain that Haru cared deeply for his other childhood friend. He even quit _swimming_ for Rin's sake, just because he had hurt him. And that was years ago, their relationship has only grown since then.

"Do you care about this person more than you care about anyone else? More than yourself?"

He really was just asking Haruka to state the obvious at this point.

".... I think so." Haruka  affirmed, looking down at his salt stained boots "I want to make all of his dreams come true."

"Go to Tokyo with him, then." Makoto said, and Haruka looked up at him in complete shock.

"How did you-"

"It's Rin, of course." It wasn't even a question. "And you definitely love him."

Haruka blushed profusely, a sight Makoto hadn't seen too many times in his life.

"..... yeah."

He would be a little lonely, but more so he was really proud of his friend.

_It's about time._

"Makoto."

He looked up to see Haruka standing, a mitten-clad hand outstretched before him. He smiled pleasantly and accepted the hand being offered, allowing himself to be pulled up from the step.

"Have fun in America." Haru said, and Makoto began to laugh at his friend's randomness.

"I'm not leaving _tomorrow,_ you know!" Makoto nudged him lightly in the ribs "I've still got that history project to worry about, silly Haru-chan!"

A warm smile spread across Makoto's face, and for once Haru didn't tell him to 'drop the chan'. Haruka instead smiled back, and Makoto knew then that he really would miss his strange friend.

"Want to go play Mario Kart or something?" he asked as he lead the way back to his house.

Haruka nodded in reply. "Sure."

 

* * *

 

When Haruka had returned home, he had called one of the scouters from Tokyo (who was positively  _stoked_  to hear from him) to confirm a few things and answer some questions. Going to Tokyo posed no problem whatsoever academically, it was the  _financial_ part of it that was the biggest issue.

Now, Haruka was staring at his phone, trying to decide on the best way to ask his parents for the 800,000 yen tuition. After all, where would the money come from without them? He certainly didn't have it. 

Truthfully, he hated phone calls with his parents. The reason being that they always attacked him with a barrage of repetitive, useless questions.

'Are you doing well in school?'

'How's the swim club going?'

'You're eating things other than mackerel, right?'

'How's Tachibana-kun doing?'

'Are you remembering to brush your teeth?'

'Can't you come visit us soon?'

'Have you thought about graduation yet?'

Haruka would just sigh deeply.

'Yes, good, yes, fine, yes, depends, and no.'

His deadpan reply became a monthly ritual. He should have just recorded it and played it whenever they called. That way he wouldn't have to get out of the tub to stop his house line's incessant ringing. He knew his parents meant well, but he couldn't help but be reluctant to phone them. 

But now, he needed their help, so he _had_ to suck it up and call. 

 _Better sooner than later._  He thought, glaring at the small machine. _I'll just get it over with. I'm doing it for Rin after all._

He picked up his phone, and dialed the number without thinking. _Done._

A gentle, but also slightly confused voice picked up the other end. 

Haruka never called _them_ so of course she was unsure.

"Hello?"

He sighed.

"Hi, mom."

 

* * *

 

Back in the shower rooms of Samezuka academy, Rin hummed softly as he shrugged out of his clothes. He began to hang them on a hook, excited to take a long and relaxing shower. He still felt kind of icky from the day before, and he was pretty sure he smelled faintly of vomit.

As he was taking off his jeans, he felt something round and lumpy in his pocket. He stuck his hands in, curious as to what he could possibly have in there. Coins? He felt something strange inside... a few cold, round, and smooth objects strung together with some sort of rope. He pulled a familiar looking bracelet out of his pocket, and was very confused as to where it had come from. It was made of a braided leather, and the lumps were small turquoise beads. Where had he seen this before? He was almost certain he had.

 _Oh, it's Haru's bracelet!_ He realized. _But why is it in my pocket?_

After studying it for a bit, something clicked in his head, and he remembered Haru's words with absolute clarity.

 _Someone important to me has the same one_ he had said.

This wasn't Haru's bracelet. It was his own. 

_Happy birthday, Rin. _  
__

So Haru had... Haru had given  _him_  the matching one.

When did he do that?

When...?

And like a tidal wave, memories of last night flooded Rin's poor, unprepared mind.

_I want to be with you too._

_I want to kiss you..._

_Can I kiss you?_

_Rin, you're still drunk._

The redhead grabbed for the shower rod, trying to steady himself as his body shut down and his legs buckled beneath him.

_Maybe but... I always feel like kissing you._

_Even when I'm not._

"Oh my god, I fucked up, I fucked up," he sputtered, trying not to hyperventilate. "I fucked up-"

 _I pinned Haru down!_ He screamed in his head. _Holy shit, I really tried to kiss him!_

The image of Haru lying beneath him, flushed and wanting, floated into Rin's mind. Haru had almost let Rin get away with his debauchery too, up until the point where he had smelled Rin's breath and turned his head away.

Rin had questions all right, _many_ questions. Why did Haru lean into his touch? If Rin hadn't been drunk, would Haruka have let him continue? Why would Haruka do that.. why didn't he just push Rin away?

Rin groaned, banging his head against the tiled shower wall in frustration.

Also, why didn't Haru mention any of this to him this morning?! He called Rin 'important to him', even after yesterday's incident! Did he want to pretend it never happened at all? Did he pity Rin? Is that why?

 _Does he know that I'm in love with him?_ he thought with horror.

"No, he's oblivious to romance, he definitely doesn't." Rin mumbled, trying to calm himself down "The bracelet, it has to be like a friendship bracelet. And the almost-kiss.." he shook his head "He probably just thought I was acting weird because I was drunk. Yeah. Definitely."

_But what was that look in his eyes as I stroked his face..._

"I need to stop thinking about it. I'm not getting my hopes up." Rin announced, beginning to strip off the rest of his clothing.

"You also need to stop talking out loud to yourself in a public place." A familiar voice called from the shower beside him.

Rin froze on the spot, struck with embarrassment like a lightning bolt to a tree.

"Sousuke?!" he screeched, bounding out of his stall in his boxers to confirm that it was indeed his other childhood friend.

Sousuke was wrapped in a towel, crossing his arms with a sly grin on his face.

"When you're done your shower, be ready to tell me everything." he said, taking his leave before Rin could even protest.

"Fucking hell." Rin swore, cursing the sight of that devilish grin

"I don't even understand any of it _myself."_

 

* * *

 

"So." Sousuke said, sitting on the desk chair across from Rin, who thunked himself down roughly on the edge of his bed. "From what I heard in the shower room... you got drunk, harassed someone, and then you stole their jewelry?"

Rin growled, and Sousuke could tell right away by his friend's irritated frown that he didnt want to talk about what happened. _All the more reason to pry it out of him,_ Sousuke thought.  _Things never end well when Rin bottles up his feelings._

"I also heard you mention that you didn't want to get your hopes up." Sousuke added, crossing his arms against his chest "Who's been graced with Matsuoka Rin's affections?"

"Who do you _think?_ " Rin grumbled in response.

"You're right, it's pretty obvious." Sousuke said, laughing.

"Was it obvious to everyone _except_ me?!" he asked incredulously. 

Sousuke merely laughed some more, causing Rin to blush a deep scarlet with embarrassment.

Rin's obsession with Nanase was no secret to Sousuke. He couldn't help but hold a little contempt toward him, just because it was _he_ who took Rin away from him in grade school. Once Rin had caught sight of the other blue eyed swimmer, he had been hooked to the boy like a fish on a line. 

When Sousuke stopped laughing, he gave his frustrated friend a concerned smile.

"Seriously though, are you alright? What happened between you two?" 

Rin visibly hesitated, but then ultimately decided to tell Sousuke everything. He listened attentively as Rin recalled every moment of his birthday party; from when he walked through the door, to drinking the sake, to the sleepover, and then right to the morning before he left. Rin even showed Sousuke all of the presents he received, including the controversial leather bracelet from Nanase.

Sousuke had to admit, Rin's other friends really did care about him a lot, too. He would try to get along better with them in the future, he decided. 

"I finally did it. I fucked up for real this time... " Rin trailed off, and Sousuke took a seat beside his friend to pat him reassuringly on the back.

"Nah, I think it'll be fine. You two worked through your problems before, so of course you can do it again."

"Yeah but that wa _s different!"_ Rin argued, shaking his mop of red hair. "What if he knows that I'm in _love_ with him? He's not going to want to be with me anymore, he'll feel unsafe and awkward around the person who thinks of him in a way that a childhood friend _shouldn't._ "

Sousuke couldn't agree with him. If Rin had been in love with him instead for example, Sousuke definitely wouldn't want to stop being his friend. In his opinion, having someone say they're in love with you was the ultimate compliment. It would be stupid to feel unsafe or awkward around someone who loved you, because obviously they put you before them self. Sousuke could see that notion very prominently in Rin's feelings towards Nanase.

"Nanase would be _flattered_ if you told him the truth." Sousuke told the redhead sternly "He clearly didn't feel unsafe with you this morning when he pulled back your hair and made you tea, and he's pretty quiet and awkward around _everyone,_ so you don't need to worry about that either."

Rin still looked unconvinced as he absentmindedly ran his fingers over the bracelet on his wrist. "I don't know-"

Then suddenly, his phone began to buzz, interrupting what he was about to say.

He picked up the phone and visibly jolted, his breathing became heavy again and his hands started to shake.

"Shit, shit, shit," He chanted as Sousuke wordlessly took the phone from his hands to look at the message that caused him to panic.

 

 

**From: Haruka Nanase (5:11 pm.)**

**\- Can you meet me at Iwatobi elementary at 6? I need to talk to you.**

 

 

"I'm gonna die, my life is over." Rin announced, falling down with his back onto the bed. 

"Don't be such a drama queen." Sousuke said, placing the phone on Rin's chest "I think you should go."

"But.. what if he rejects me?" Rin asked quietly, and Sousuke didn't think he'd ever seen him so distraught.

"Then you take it like a man and move on." Sousuke said bluntly, because _someone_ needed to give this kid a push, and that was a best friend's job right? "Stop running away just because you're scared."

That last line really seemed to hit home. Rin sat up abruptly, making an expression as if he just realized something.

"You're right, Sousuke." He said, raking his hands through his damp hair "All I've been doing is running away. I.. I ran away from my feelings, all the way to Australia, and then again to this school instead of Iwatobi. And now," he picked up his cell and stared at Haruka's message intently. "I would be doing the same. Exactly the same."

Sousuke watched Rin type out his reply, hitting 'send' without hesitation.

"I'm terrified, but that's alright. I'm not going to run away anymore." he announced as he shoved his wallet into his pocket. 

"You should also thank him for the present." Sousuke suggested.

"True!" Rin leapt out of his bed, scrambling to put on his boots and jacket. Sousuke just sat there and watched him with a content feeling, truly believing that everything would turn out alright. 

Rin was about to grab the door handle, but then he turned around and locked eyes with his other childhood friend, and he felt warmth pool up in the pit of his nervous stomach. Sousuke smiled and held out a fist, for a fist bump.

Rin smiled back, touching his knuckles to Sousuke's. 

"Good luck." Sousuke said, and Rin thanked him, then bounded out the door.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gotta love those big brother baras


	6. Breath

Rin could see the long branches of _the_ cherry blossom tree as he got closer to the school. It was only February, so it wasn't yet in bloom, but it still grew high and mighty above Iwatobi elementary. He knew exactly where Haruka would be; waiting for him right under it, near the garden they built as kids.  
  
"Rin!" Haruka called out to him as soon as he was in sight. Haru always was the one to notice him first.  
  
Rin gave him a small wave as he approached, a nervous sweat ran down his neck. Haruka was sitting on the bricks that they had painted; Rin could make out his own brick that said 'for the team', as well as Haruka's 'free'. The sight of it flooded Rin's mind with memories of the past for a second time that day.

 

_Oh! You remembered me?_

_I just happened to end up at this school when I moved_

_I'm going to Australia_

_Let's swim together, Nanase_

_If you swim with me, I'll show you a sight you've never seen before_

 

Haruka was looking at him expectantly, his nose rosy from chilly February air.

 

_Come to laugh at my pathetic loss?_

_You're the reason I..._  
  
_Why doesn't it say free?_  
  
_I want to swim with you guys._  
  
_Let's go, Rin!_

  
"Miss me already?" Rin joked, trying to act like his usual cheeky self instead of the terrified, anxious mess that he actually was.  
  
"I did." Haruka replied, standing up and dusting off his coat, as if what he had just said wasn't completely out of character.  
  
_Is he messing with me?_   Rin couldn't tell whether or not the other was being sarcastic.  
  
He ultimately decided to drop it. He remembered that he hadn't yet thanked Haru for the gift, and thought that since he forgot that morning, it was only right to do so as soon he could.  
  
"Oh hey.. thanks for the bracelet. Sorry I forgot to thank you ealier..." He removed his hand from his jacket pocket to show the leather accessory around his wrist, touching it fondly. "It's really cool; definitely something I would have picked out for myself."  
  
"So you remember, then?" Haruka asked, his eyes azure and wide. "When I gave it to you, last night."  
  
_Last night._ That shameful, despairing feeling washed over Rin once again, and his gaze flit to the floor.  
  
"Yes, I remember." he mumbled "I remember everything. Listen, Haru, I really am sor-"  
  
"You don't need to apologize again." Haruka interrupted, and Rin looked back up and met his gaze "That's not what I want to talk about."  
  
"Okay." he replied, his voice tentative "What did you want to talk about then?"  
  
_What could be so important that he had to tell me in person, right away?_  
  
"I made a decision." Haruka said, a serious expression on his face.  
  
"W-What is it?" Rin asked cautiously, expecting something horrible like _I'm breaking off our friendship_ or _I'm moving to America with Makoto_.  
  
Haruka grasped Rin's hands through their mittens. The gesture confused Rin. Was it meant to be consoling? 

 _Did someone die?!_  
  
"I've decided to go to Tokyo with you." Haruka announced, and Rin stared at his friend, almost not believing his ears.

There was a moment of silence as the thought processed in Rin's brain.  
  
"W-What?! Seriously?!" he choked.  
  
"I talked to the scouters that recruited you, and they're putting me on the same team."

"WHAT?!"  
  
"Yeah, we just need to figure out where we're going to live."  
  
_Where WE'RE going to live?!  
_

"Y-You want to live with me?!" Rin sputtered with delight  "Oh my god, this- this is-! I can't believe it!"  
  
Haruka squeezed his hands lightly. Rin could barely contain his excitement. Even if he couldn't _be_ with Haru in the way he truly wanted to, seeing him every day would be more than he ever hoped for.  
  
"What.. made you change your mind?" he asked shyly.  
  
He knew how stressed out Haruka was by this.. it was evident by the incident at Samezuka's pool.   
  
"You did."

Rin blinked.  
  
"...  _I_   changed your mind?"  
  
"In a way," Haruka replied "I changed my own mind, but you were the reason why I did so."

 _Was it the persuasion? I didn't mean to pressure him into doing something he didn't want to._  
  
Rin took a breath, to protest, but Haruka spoke first.  
  
"For some reason, you reach your highest potential when we swim together. To be the best you can be, and to win a gold medal in the Olympics... I want that for you."  
  
Rin shut his mouth again, his eyes wide in disbelief as he stood there.  
  
"If I can do anything to help you achieve your dream, then I will. I want to."  
  
"But-but what about you? What about what _you_ want?" Rin argued, feeling guilty about pressuring his friend "Moving to a different city, picking a different career path... that's a huge commitment, just to help one person."  
  
And then, Haruka smiled. Not just a smirk or a grin, but a genuine uncontrollable upturning of lips.  
  
Haruka smiling with their cherry blossom tree behind him- Rin burned the image into his mind  
  
"You're not just any person, Rin. You're the one who saved me- the most important person in my life."  
  
"Me?" Rin whispered in confusion.  
  
"You." Haruka confirmed softly "That's what I want, Rin. To be with you in Tokyo.. to help you reach your goal. If you'll have me, I'll follow you wherever you go."  
  
"H-Haru.." Rin choked, feeling his eyes burn with tears.  
  
"I decided on my dream. My dream is to help you achieve yours."  
  
Rin felt the tears dripping down his cheeks, but he was so overjoyed that he didn't care to hide his embarrassing emotions.  
  
"But... why?" he choked out the last word in complete disbelief.

"Because I love you, idiot."  
  
And then, Rin Matsuoka malfunctioned. The gears in his brain stopped turning and his mind shut down like someone had unplugged it.  
  
Haruka's words were an epiphany to his ears, and his face was the most beautiful sight that Rin had ever seen, or would ever see. His heart swelled up in his chest, overwhelming his senses to the point where he just couldn't do more than stare at the impossible boy before him with a dumbfounded expression.  
  
"You breathed life back into me..." Haruka told him, his serene voice resonating into the deepest caverns of Rin's soul "I'd like to return the favour."  
  
And Rin's world came crashing in on itself when he was pulled forward, and cool lips gently pressed against his own unsuspecting ones. Electricity shot through his body, and Rin was suddenly more awake than he had ever been in his entire life.  
  
Like a natural reaction, he opened up for Haruka, allowing the other to pour his breath right into him, returning it from that day weeks ago. It filled not only his lungs, but every fibre of Rin's being. They were connected, and Rin was so wondrously overwhelmed because this was _Haru_ kissing him. _Haru's_ velvety lips moulding against his own. The very lips that he'd had a bittersweet taste of, and had yearned for his entire life.  
  
Everything felt so fulfilling and right that Rin wanted to stand under that tree, _their tree_ , in that earth-shattering moment forever. Damn the Olympics.  
  
The kiss ended all too soon, and Haruka pulled away with a shy, yet cathartic expression.

"Now we're even." he mumbled, a pink blush staining his porcelain cheeks.

Rin's heart overflowed with affection at the sight of him. He couldn't help himself, he yanked Haruka into a sudden embrace, his face still damp from the tears.

"You cry too much." Haruka whispered, bringing his arms up around Rin's torso.

This time, Rin did not flinch. He nuzzled his face into the crook of Haruka's neck, the wool of his scarf tickling his face. He took in Haruka's fresh scent and smiled to himself.  
  
In that moment, Rin realized that _yes_ , all he's ever dreamed of can and will come true, so long as he loved this strange, beautiful boy with all of his heart.  
  
_Oh, I haven't told him yet._  Rin realized, and he leaned away from the other so that he could look him in the eyes.  
  
"Nanase Haruka." Rin said to him, and he was surprised that his voice did not crack. "I've always loved you." 

 _It feels so fulfilling to say it out loud_ , he thought.  
  
"Me too..." Haruka squeezed him a little bit tighter "I just didn't know it."  
  
Rin was so overjoyed he felt he would burst with emotions.  
  
"Can I kiss you again?" he whispered into Haruka's ear.  
  
"As long as you're not drunk this time." the other replied quietly.  
  
"I promise I'm not." Rin laughed, and he pushed down Haruka's scarf to press a soft kiss to warm skin of his neck.  
  
And the two boys grinned and hugged and cried (well, Rin did) in that very spot for quite a while after that, sharing their warmth in the cool February air. They then walked to the train station hand-in-hand, feeling more complete than either had ever felt in their entire 18 years.

 

* * *

 

 

**Two months later...**

 

Haruka stood with Rin before the door to their new living arrangements, room #525, with their luggages in tow. Rin wasn't keen on the idea of dorms (he'd had his fair share of dorms apparently) so the two of them pitched in together for an apartment in a building that was only a twenty minute walk from their school.  
  
Haruka stuck the key in the door, and opened it to reveal the small albeit cozy living space inside. Most places in Tokyo weren't too large, mainly because the population of the city was so huge that space was very limited. Their apartment contained two bedrooms and one bathroom, all of which were connected to the dual living room/kitchenette.  
  
Haruka stared, mesmerized, at the sight. Soon, Rin and his things' would be strewn about the place, and the clean lemony scent would most likely be replaced with that of chlorine. He looked forward to it- making this place their home. 

 _Here is where Rin and I will build our future together..._  
  
"Oh, I didn't know we had a balcony!"  Rin exclaimed delightedly, dropping his bags with a thunk and rushing over to the other end.  
  
Haruka followed him as he threw open the glass doors, letting in a cool spring breeze. It was the beginning of April, and though the city was far more congested than the suburbs, the air in Tokyo felt clean and fresh. Or maybe it was just Haruka who felt it was so- he had been embracing everything that presented itself to him with a newfound positivity.   
  
"Haru! Look at our view!" Rin squeaked excitedly, leaning over the balcony slightly farther than Haruka deemed safe. 

He stepped beside the other and examined the view. There was a park right below their building, and it was filled with dozens and dozens of cherry blossom trees. The entire expanse was a lovely shade of pastel pink. Petals covered the ground and trees, floated in the river, and whirled around in the wind. They were  _everywhere_ \- looking below, Haruka noticed that some had even landed on their balcony, all the way up on the fifth floor.  
  
He glanced sideways at Rin, and found him gazing nostalgically at the pink explosion, his crimson eyes positively sparkling.  _He really is a romantic,_  Haruka thought. Fondness blossomed in his chest as he recalled all of the memories that he and Rin had shared underneath the soft pastel trees. The day Rin transferred into his class, when he left for Australia, their reconciliation before the relay, Rin crying in front of the petal-filled pool, and then his most treasured memory: their confessions at Iwatobi elementary.  
  
Haruka noticed a petal had caught in Rin's hair, probably by the wind, and automatically brought his hand up to gently detangle it from the crimson strands.  
  
"Oh?" Rin said, confused by the sudden touch.  
  
"There was a petal." Haruka told him, lifting it up between them to show the other.  
  
"Ah-!"  
  
A sudden gust of wind then blew the petal right out of his loose grasp. The two watched silently as it floated downwards, swaying, until it was just a speck in the distance, and they could no longer make it out.  
  
"Well" Rin announced, then held out his hand to Haruka. Maybe Haruka was becoming a romantic too, because in that moment, on the balcony of their shared apartment with cherry blossom petals floating around him, Rin appeared to be glowing. "Wanna go unpack our stuff?"

"Definitely" Haruka replied, accepting the others grasp with a slight grin.

"Let's go, Rin."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you everyone for your support! I hope you enjoyed this shameless fluff-fest...
> 
> Also, sorry about the craptonne of cherry blossoms, but really, cherry blossoms are just SO rinharu!  
> Thanks again guys! 
> 
> xoxo


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